Gratitude Is a Super Power in a Discontented World

Social media floods us with nihilistic data points about everything wrong with the world. It started with the news industry and “if it bleeds, it leads”, and in the online age it’s well understood that negative content overperforms. It makes the mood in the world appear awfully bleak.

Everyone is focused on what is wrong in their lives, what they don’t have, and what other people are doing with their time. It’s hard to imagine how that would not make people depressed.

But here’s the thing… all I can see are blessings, so understated yet persistent in our lives.

America is profoundly fortunate that it can afford to throw away all its collective gratitude to obsess over what it lacks.

What becomes normal in your life always becomes something you take for granted. The grass is greener on the other side is a funny old adage, because it implies that you’ll cross the river for greener pastures, and then immediately look back to the other side where you came from, and it’s greener. Contentment is not super popular with Americans.

Most of us have never been homeless, starved, or denied access to basic needs.

The absence of certainty about where you’ll sleep that night or getting no assurances of safety in a homeless shelter is not something most Americans can relate to… and that’s good. We’re lucky.

But this was part of my childhood. My family was forced into homelessness twice.

The first time we became homeless, we stayed in a hotel room for a few days until a stranger offered my mother a bedroom in a trailer for her and two kids.

I was relatively young, but I still remember staying in the cramped space inside this woman’s trailer until my mother could save up enough money to rent an apartment.

A few years later, we would be wrongfully evicted from that apartment, leaving us in the familiar predicament of not knowing where to go.

This eviction is something I still remember vividly, as it was my earliest memory of my mother crying in front of me. We watched men remove all of our possessions from the apartment onto the lawn for everyone to see.

We were supposed to have a townhouse to move into, but the people who took her deposit never gave her the keys and refused to return her money.

We had no choice but to place all of our possessions in a storage unit, without any idea when we’d be back on our feet again. Back to the homeless shelter we went.

While staying there, I lived in fear of the strangers we shared space with. My mother told me explicitly to stay away from them. Throughout this entire experience, my mother was a full-time nurse who worked hard to save up enough money to get us out of the nightmare.

It took a few months, but we were finally able to get out and rent an aging townhouse. It wasn’t particularly nice, didn’t have the greatest amenities, and had roaches in the kitchen, but it was still an upgrade over the shelter.

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him" - (Psalm 28:7)

My mother taught me by her actions to be grateful for what I have, rather than taking things for granted. She demonstrated that no one is entitled to a particular outcome in life. I learned at an early age that life happens, and the possible outcomes are many. A true roller coaster ride.

No matter the ups and downs, there is plenty to be thankful for.

Despite how traumatic it was for me to experience homelessness, I am thankful for it.

As I’ve gotten older, it’s made me more appreciative of my mother, her hustle amidst hardship, and her sacrifices to her children safe. Every person who meets my mother sees her work ethic and how her tenacity has rubbed off on me.

My mother was never unemployed and never considered taking public assistance. Her motivation helped us understand that every negative situation was temporary. Things do get better!

I constantly give thanks for where I am today. I am thankful for a mother who displayed the ethic of a victor instead of a victim. She never laid back waiting for pity or a handout.

As a married man and a father to an adult child, I’m thankful for every day that I can wake up next to a woman who loves me and with a son who makes me proud. He won’t have to taste homelessness to appreciate the roof over his head.

Life happens, so appreciate what you have today. It’s never too late to be grateful.

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” ― Epicurus

Adam B. Coleman is an author and founder of Wrong Speak Publishing. He writes on Substack at Speaking Wrong At The Right Time.